Singing, Stress, and Slightly Crooked TikToks

Ipost TikToks on my phone. They are usually videos of me singing, or some random pictures that are apparently supposed to be super visually appealing. The really annoying thing is, this isn’t just TikTok’s inaccessibility when I’m scrolling through videos, it’s also the fact that setting up a camera gets on my freaking nerves. The last video I posted, I wrote, “Don’t judge the bad camera setup, I am blind you know.” You should all go watch it and tell me how bad it actually was.

Hello Jackets! It’s me, Landon Bryson, writing to you for the first time in a while, which I feel is what I write in all of my blogs. Maybe I’m just crazy. I should start writing more. I’m going to start telling myself that you all live for these posts, so I should write as much as possible. It’s all about motivation.

In other, more exciting news, the BHS choir is opening their Harmony House this week. The choir will be providing drinks, fruits, and delicious baked goods. If students don’t remember, this was a big hit last semester, so don’t miss your chance to stop by and check it out. Bring some cash with you in case you feel like buying up the place.

Also, just want to point out, my birthday is next week! I will be turning a solid 16, and I have very mixed feelings about it. On the one hand, I’m excited because I turn one year older and closer to going to college. On the other hand, my little sister is turning 7 this year. How do you think that makes me feel???! (But it’s fine, I don’t even care.)

I was talking earlier about the motivation to write blog posts. Obviously I was making a joke out of it, but honestly, motivation is definitely needed for more serious things. I won’t give you the bloody details, but lately I’ve been going through a lot of stress with school, and starting applications for college classes and guide dogs and camps and all that. I have been staying up super late to get schoolwork done, but oversleeping in the mornings.

I’ve been trying to work out at home, because, one, I want to look better, and two, the more fit I am, the better my singing can be, if I understand it correctly. But also, I don’t play sports, so I don’t burn off everything that I eat/drink like a lot of other people in high school. 

But when I’m super stressed, with school and personal stuff, I get home and I just want to collapse. I don’t have any motivation to work out, to study for classes, to play music. I get more sad than productive, and I don’t really get anything done, and that’s not good.

What I’ve learned is that no one can make you do things. You have to force yourself to look past all of your bad moods and sad thoughts, to force yourself to take care of yourself and to focus on your priorities. You have to tell yourself, there are better days and happier moments ahead of you. 

I was getting ready for bed a few days ago and I didn’t even have the energy to get up and brush my teeth. But I did, and as I was doing it I was thinking of all the people in my life that I know are just waiting for something. And I started telling myself, don’t hope, just do it. I’m not hoping that things are going to get better for me, I’m doing the things that can get me where I need to go. I’m slowly pulling back from all of that frustration and stress, and I’m working on accomplishing greater things that benefit me in the long run. And everyone else can do the same.

I’m not saying don’t allow yourself to feel. I’m saying don’t allow yourself to be consumed by it forever. Know that there are people out there who love and accept you and all your faults. Learn from your mistakes and work on what you know is problematic. Time is going to pass anyway, so you might as well spend it wisely.

Well, that’s it for this week. I hope everyone has a great weekend, and I hope everyone remembers what I wrote today. Until next time, it’s your favorite blind Jacket!